Polti's Invaluable Tool

So back in 1916 this French writer, Georges Polti, pored over classical Greek and French stories, as well as contemporary (in 1916) French literature.  And after this he observed that there are only 36 Dramatic Situations, ever.  And he wrote a book about it, citing examples.

I am, by nature, a thorough learner.  At first I learn enough to be getting on with, but when a subject intrigues me I can't learn enough.  I want to learn everything that can be learned about that subject EVER.

I am especially like this with my writing.  I am insecure about my writing.  I know I can write well enough to impress many (maybe, under the right circumstances, even most) but I am also keenly aware that I am, by no stretch of the imagination, the best.  I am no Shakespeare, I am no Whedon, I am no Sorkin nor Crichton nor Adams.  So if there are any tools out there that might help ensure that my craft is at least as good as I can make it at this moment, I WANT IT!

Enter Monsieur Polti's list...

Despite not being published, I have written enough to know that the worst sin I can commit is to be boring, particularly in long-form fiction, where I am asking the Reader to bare with me as I drop bread crumbs leading them to a narrative payoff.  I have been a reader for enough newbie screenplays that I know noobs can write "scenes" that aren't actually scenes at all.  I mean, people say stuff and people do things, but the scene has no beginning to speak of or end.  It just starts and stops, and completely fails to advance the story or our understanding of the characters to any significant degree.

And I get it!  I've done it tons!  You've got this great action or this great line of dialog you need to get out there so people can say, "That's a cool line!" or, "That was awesome!"  But the problem is that if the script/novel/story you stick that action or line into sucks, you might get the compliments you were hoping for, but it's couched within an uncomfortable, "No, yeah, it was good... I like that one line!"

I don't want to plant a pearl in a pile of shit and be remembered for that.  I want that one pearl to stand out among a string of pearls!  Hell, I would love it if people forgot that one pearl because they are so passionately in love with one of the other many pearls I've created!  How cool would THAT be?!  You've created so much goodness that people miss YOUR favorite line/action because they have adopted something (maybe something you didn't even know would resonate) that you've created!

Okay, so part of my defense against mediocrity is the Outline: I make sure my entire story doesn't suck before I invest the man hours an imagination it's going to take for me to realize this world and these characters and situations.

Another way is to (try to) make sure that every scene is actually a scene.  AND -- and these are both pretty tightly bound up with Polti's list of 36 Dramatic Situations -- I want to make sure I UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M CREATING.

The best way to illustrate this is to suggest you watch ANY of the X-MEN movies not directed by Brett Ratner, then watch X-MEN: LAST STAND.  Other directors know what they're trying to get the Audience to feel, but Ratner has NO concept of human emotions.  He just wants to get as quickly as possible to the next action scene.  You can see that the screenwriters have created for a moment for two characters to have "a moment", for those amazing actors to really earn their pay, but Ratner doesn't give a shit; he just wants to blow something else up.

Okay, maybe that's not the best illustration...  (Besides, I would hate to inflict X3 on any unsuspecting innocent...)  (Just watch the OTHER X-MEN flicks, there are 5 others as of this writing, ALL excellent!)

Let's say you have a scene in a Comedy wherein a cute chick is trying to avoid an annoying jock dude at a party.  He has already expressed a desire to hook-up with her, and she has rejected him as gently as she can manage...  Too gently, in fact.  Jock-O thinks she's into him since she hasn't actually said the word "No" to him.

She's all alone at the party (her "wingman" is distracted by something else), and she suddenly realizes she doesn't have line-of-sight on Jockstrap!  Oh shit!  She needs to find Wingman-chick before Jock-strap finds her!  So she moves from room to room, carefully scoping out the corners and nitches as she enters each room, moving as stealthily through each room as she can...

But what she doesn't know is that Jock-strap is right behind her, following her, waiting for her to land somewhere so he can continue his "romantic" advance.

So you're write this scene, describing what you see in your head, and you expect the situation to strike the Reader as hilarious as it appears in your mind.

BUT...

The scene would play so much more hysterically if you realized that you were actually writing A HORROR SCENE!  Specifically, a Slasher scene!

I mean, the scene doesn't end with Cute Chick's bloody demise, but that doesn't actually matter.  To get the biggest response from the joke, you can write this section of your story as though it were a horror scene, and the Cute Chick is trying to flee the evil Slasher, and when he catches up with her it's (figuratively) as though she has been slain by a stalker.

Actually, there may be a better way to approach this particular scene literarily (if that's a real word), but you get my point, right?  You can write a scene where Cute Chick tries to find her Wingman (Wingperson), which possesses no inherent emotional investment by the Reader, or you write a scene in which she is stalked by Jock-hugger.  And even if you fail to bring off any real, genuine feelings of suspense in the Reader during that scene, I'll bet you that they'll give you props for the effort!

Because one scene is written boringly and one is written with some attitude!

In the stuff I've read, I am much more liable to give credit to a scene that tries and fails than I am a scene that merely trudges forward, forcing me to grit my teeth until the next cool scene comes along.

Speaking of trudging along, I feel as though this horse is thoroughly dead, and my whippin' arm's getting tired.

What I really should be doing -- what I should have started doing about an hour ago -- is writing my "Polti Report".

I'm analyzing my novel in 3 ways:

1. The story as a whole
2. Each individual scene
3. The major movements (or sequences) within the story made up by collections of scenes

I want to make sure I know what type of scene/sequence I'm writing, and make sure I have all the essential elements that make up each scene.

And I will be doing that with this handy version of the 36 Dramatic Situations...

By the way, this step is also useful for balance en the Creative Mind and the Analytical mind.  Creating scenes for my outline, I have been largely engaging my Creative Mind.  (Is that Left brain or Right Brain?  I can't keep them straight.)  And I noticed that as soon as I decided that my outline was complete and it is time to actually write the chapters, I Analytical Mind started finding way to convince me that the novel isn't going to be good enough, that I don't know what I'm doing, and that no one is going to buy this book after it's published.

The Analytical Mind is like that.  It doesn't seem to like things that aren't perfect.  (And what really IS perfect?!)

See, I think the Analytical Mind is just afraid of being made unimportant by the Creative Mind that is going to be doing the heavy lifting for the next few months.  The Creative Mind is about to take over and virtually LIVE the novel a I crank out pages, and I will be keeping the Analytical Mind locked as far, far away as I can manage while I'm pounding out those pages.

However...!

When I make those notes on the printed version of my Outline denoting what type of scene I'm writing, my Analytical Mind will have something to do in the background while my Creative Mind is creating an immersive experience for me and (hopefully) the Reader!

So doing this comparison before I jump into the pages allows my Creative Mind to rest and gather its strength, and it allows my Analytical Mind to get involved in the process again, and then have something to occupy it while Creative Mind is playing blissfully on the page.

("Okay, I need you to keep count of all the blue cars that drive by.  Can you do that for me?  It's important that I know how many blue cars drove past while I was fixing this flat tire, so I'm trustig you to really pay attention and keep count for me, okay?")

Final Outline!!!

PHILIP BLACKWOOD MYSTERIES #1
Outline

by

Ray Jay Edwards

Scene 1:

BRITNEY BRIMES (25) is in the kitchen and sees a LITTLE BOY out of the corner of her eye.  She doesn't hear anything, just turns to see the boy running out of the kitchen.

Britney follows the boy, but he's not in the living room.  She walks on to the storage room, and finds the Little Boy standing there, staring at her, looking unhappy.  She tells him she's seen the little girl, but never seen him.  The Little Boy doesn't answer.

Does he know the little girl?  Is he is her friend?

The Little Boy says, "I'm not a boy," his voice deepens, his eyes become dark sockets, and he morphs, "I'm the Debbul."

Britney screams and flees.

Scene 2:

PHILIP BLACKWOOD (26) arrives at MISTY's house.  He has brought XAVIER, Misty's neighbor, with him.  Philip explains to Xavier that Misty has been bothered by monthly thumps on her roof that she feared were paranormal.  Xavier laughs, and also seems embarrassed about this.  Philip takes Misty and Xavier out front to show Misty the tree at the edge of Xavier's back yard that hangs over the edge of her roof.  He explains that Xavier has a cat who, once a month when the moon is full, freaks out, climbs the tree and scampers across Misty's roof to get to the Benny family's back yard.  The Benny's have two cats that Xavier's cat, Lilith Puffysox, likes to play with.  But Philip suggests that Xavier explains WHY this happens every full moon... Xavier has a garden in his back yard, and he is Wiccan.  Every full moon he performs a ritual inviting the gnomes to bless his garden.  This activity freaks Lilith Puffysox right out, so she escapes Xavier's yard to play with the Benny's cats, and shows up the next morning on Xavier's doorstep.  MISTY has no idea Xavier was a witch; she and Xavier strike up a friendship.  Philip's phone rings: TIFFANI needs a favor.

Scene 3:

TIFFANI meets PHILIP at a food cart.  She asks how the movie-review show is going and Philip says it's fine.  Tiffani says Max and Noel miss him; he misses them, too.  Yeah?  Yeah, Philip misses all of it, the coffee, the sitting for hours in the dark, trying to act like a responsible adult around clinets, meetings at (insert cool Austin restaurant), the whole thing.  Tiffani asks if he can help them out with one more case.  Philip jokingly asks is there's any chance it's on a weeknight and Tiffani says "no" but rushes into the pitch: The Brimes Family are being tormented, but the group -- Central Texas Paranormal Investigators (CTPI) -- can't solve it.  It's too powerful to be residual or intelligent ghosts, it is actually hurting the family and their daughter, but 2 religious cleansings have failed to exile whatever it is, and no Catholic churches in the Central Texas area will area will sanction an official cleansing.  Philip wants to help, but James (the other overnight guy) hates working on his days off and Saturday is when they tape the show.  But Philip can see that Tiffani is really, really hoping for Philip's help, so he offers to look at the evidence CTPI has collected.

Scene 4:

PHILIP review's evidence:

1. A little girl, DODDY, actually converses with the team for a couple of minutes.
2. An inhuman growl is heard in EVP.
3. A night table in the baby's room is moved 17 inches on video.
4. A small shadow turns into a large, menacing shadow on IR video.

Philip is intrigued enough to help.

Scene 5:

TIFFANI takes PHILIP to meet CARLTON BRIMES.  Britney and Ariel are at Britney's mothers.  If possible, Carlton would rather wrap this up before Ariel comes home.  (This is unrealistic, but Philip holds his tongue, though Tiffani is uncomfortable with this unrealistic expectation, too, he can tell.)

Ariel's Room: Ariel scratched, furniture moving.
Kitchen: Little girl seen.
Storage room: Little boy turns into "the devil".  Growl EVP.
Parents' bedroom: Aural conversation with Doddy.
Parents' bathroom: Banging on inside, not heard outside.
Guest bathroom (near Ariel's room): Guest pushed into shower.
Hallway: Shadow IR video.

Scene 6:

Thursday Night - As soon JAMES gets in PHILIP begs him to cover Saturday.  James obviously wants to say "no", argues in his head for a few minutes, then says he'll do it.  RELIEF!  Philip tracks down AMBER.  They banter (maybe even flirt?) for a bit, then Philip dives in: He gives her a jump drive with his scripts and video and begs her to forgive him for not being able to make it Saturday.  Amber becomes an ice queen.  Philip tries to explain that he wouldn't do this if he had a choice, and Amber informs him he doesn't.  She's barely holding this show together, scrounging every bit of advertising she can con out of someone because the General Manager keeps hinting the show doesn't make enough money to keep it on the air, and now Philip is bailing, too?  He's not bailing, he just can be here Saturday.  "That's fine", Amber says, but Philip knows it's not fine.

Scene 7:

PHILIP meets TIFFANI to talk about the case.  He's going to tell her that can continue helping them on his days off, reviewing evidence or whatever he can do, but he just can't get the time off work, but Tiffani launches right in with the background: New house, no recorded deaths or psychic trauma.  Whole neighborhood was an empty field before that.  This fact interests Philip, but he won't say why just yet, he's still going to beg off the case.  Tiffani is worried this might be "inhuman", but since "civilian" cleansings didn't work, there might be nothing CTPI can do for the Brimes family.  (During their, the 2nd, cleansing, CTPI utilized an ordained minister, so they're up against the wall.)  There is another aspect that makes Tiffani want to solve the case for the Brimes family, but she doesn't want to taint Philip's opinion.  Philip starts to explain that he can't do it, but the look on Tiffani's face won't let him.

Scene 8:

6:00 pm - PHILIP, TIFFANI, MAX and NOEL arrive to investigate Brimes house.  Philip mentions that he thinks it would be really helpful to talk to Britney Brimes, and that seems to make CARLTON really, really nervous.  (This happens over dinner.)

Scene 9:

6:55 pm - Setup happens, PHILIP & TIFFANI investigate Ariel's Room while MAX and NOEL investigate the Storage Room.  45 minutes of nothing.  (7:45 pm) TIFFANI and PHILIP investigate Parents' Bedroom while MAX and NOEL investigate Parents' Bathroom.  Another 45 minutes of nothing.  (8:37 pm) PHILIP and MAX investigate Guest Bathroom while NOEL fast-forwards through what they have of the Hallway so far and TIFFANI checks her audio to see if she has anything.  45 more minutes of nothing.

Scene 10:

9:24 pm - CARLTON has been surfing the Net in the Study for the last two-and-a-half hours.  He seems nervous (acting suspicious) when PHILIP tells him they haven't found anything yet.  Philip mentions this.  Carlton explains that he never believed in this stuff before, and he's still not comfortable with it now.  But since...since he can't deny it now, he's been noticing all kinds of strange things.  He thought he saw...no, he's sure he saw a black panther at the edge of his property one night, only twice as large as a doberman, maybe larger.  Britney has always been interested in this stuff, as Philip can tell from her DVDs, and a giant back cat doesn't figure into it.  Philip explains that that's not unheard of in the paranormal world, but he senses that there is more to Carlton's unease.  Carlton is hiding something.

Scene 11:

9:30 pm - Noel volunteers to watch the cameras (set up in the Study) while PHILIP, TIFFANI and MAX investigate the Kitchen.  Tiffani leads the EVP session, trying to engage Doddy.  Tiffani's questions are about what it was like when Doddy lived here.  After no responses, Max asks how Doddy died.  (Philip thinks this question is a mistake, but doesn't say anything.)  Max suddenly can't breathe.  They end the session and leave the room, and Max gets her breath back.

Scene 12:

9:51 pm - CARLTON is worried that maybe they should end the investigation for tonight.  MAX absolutely does not want to!  NOEL worries about an entity that would attack Max.  Is it, maybe, that dark thing they saw in the hall last time?  The thing that growled?  (Assuming they are the same entity.)  MAX is excited they're getting a response; it it wants to attack her again, she's not scared.  TIFFANI doesn't want CTPI to stir up anything that they can't deal with, and then leave Carlton here alone afterward.  PHILIP suspects it wasn't an attack: He points out that Max asked how Doddy died; maybe Doddy was "showing" her.

Scene 13:

10:01 pm - PHILIP, TIFFANI, MAX, NOEL and CARLTON are all in the Kitchen trying to contact Doddy.  10:44 pm rolls around with no results.  10:49 - 11:30 pm PHILIP and MAX investigate Ariel's room.  11:40 pm - 12:25 am PHILIP and NOEL investigate the Storage Room.  12:35 - 1:20 am PHILIP and TIFFANI sit quietly in the Hallway.  At 1:48 am Philip and CTPI have packed-up and leave CARLTON, Tiffani insisting he call her cell phone if anything happens or if Carlton needs anything.  They'll review the audio and video they caught tonight and let him know.  As Max and Noel drive off, Tiffani asks what Philip thinks.  He'll let the data inform his opinion, but right now he doesn't see anything especially odd about this haunting.  Tiffani isn't pleased with this assessment -- she clearly wants Philip to come to some specific conclusion about this case, but she won't tell Philip what's bothering her.

Scene 14:

MAX and TIFFANI talk PHILIP into joining them for a drink after the investigation.  "Like old times."  The only bar close is a Sports bar.  Tiffani, Max, Philip and NOEL discuss the case...  Max goes to the restroom.

Noel spots Max on her way out of the restroom, pinned down by a drunken BRO.  Noel eggs Philip on to "rescue" Max because Noel likes watching Philip do his Jeet Kune Do thing...

Points to make:
1. If you know how to fight, you don't have to.
2. One-Inch Punch looks like it's magic, but it's not.  (Chi?)
3. Philip seems to anticipate opponent's attack by "sensing" or predicting his next move.  Again, looks like magic but it's not.

Scene 15:

Sunday night - PHILIP works.

Monday evening - Philip begins reviewing his audio and makes notes.  He gets about halfway through it because he places audio recorders in room where he isn't.

Monday night - TIFFANI calls to see if Philip has found anything.  She and the others found nothing, so far.  Some possible EVPs and a few "orbs" in pictures (probably dust), but nothing of interest.  However, Tiffani did some research and found out that there was a low-rent apartment complex on the land for a couple of years before the land was bought by the Tiger Group out of Japan.  (1995 - 2001)  This get's Philip's attention.  He asks her if she will keep digging, and if Noel can check out UFO reports in that area while she's doing that.  Tiffani asks what Philip is thinking but he's not sure it's even worth mentioning.

Scene 16:

Tuesday night - PHILIP hears an inhuman growl uttering "GET OUT!" from the recorder in the Parent's Bathroom.  He checks the time; it's right around when Max couldn't breath in the Kitchen.  He checks the time on his audio recording of the Kitchen incident: It's an exact match!  He picks up his phone to call Tiffani, but his phone rings right at that instant: It's NOEL...  Noel has an EVP from the Storage Room that Philip needs to hear...

Scene 17:

Wednesday evening - PHILIP meets CTPI at TIFFANI's house.  NOEL feels that the identical EVPs happening at the exact moment when Max couldn't breath indicates she was attacked.  MAX is uncharacteristically scared by the EVPs.  Philip points out "Then why didn't the religious ceremonies work?"  So, Noel wants to know, what's Philip's theory.  Philip doesn't have one yet, he's still analyzing the facts.  Noel spells out the case for demonic infestation:

1. Ariel scratched
2. Little boy turns into "The Devil"
3. Parents' bathroom banging
4. Guest pushed into shower
5. Inhuman growl EVP
6. Night table in Ariel's room moves 17 inches
7. Small shadow turns into Large shadow
8. "Get out!" and Max can't breathe
9. Demons reported to pretend to be ghosts of children

But the religious cleansings would have worked if it were demonic.  Tiffani talked to Carlton earlier today and there wasn't anything going on in the house since the investigation, so they still have time to figure this out.  They just need to investigate again.  But Philip can't take another day off work...

Scene 18:

Thursday - At the TV station, PHILIP visits AMBER's office.  He wants to apologize again for Saturday.  Amber apologizes instead for her behavior: Amber is barely holding this show together, scrounging every bit of advertising she can con out of someone because the General Manager keeps hinting the show doesn't make enough money to keep it on the air, and Philip not showing up Saturday seemed like maybe he sensed the ship was sinking and was going overboard before it sank beneath them all.  A little flirtatiously, Amber asks if Philip DVR-ed the show.  He did, and he loved her changes to his segments.  Amber says she had to tweak his scripts a little because the way he writes is so... HIM.  (She makes it sound like a compliment...and maybe a come-on.)  Philip has to get back to work.

Scene 19:

At work, PHILIP checks his emails.  He got an email from Noel listing the UFO reports in the area: One witness spotted lights in the sky twice this year.  Two witnesses spotted a craft here last year. One spotted lights last year.  Another 3 spotted lights 4 years ago.

TIFFANI stops by the TV station.  Philip is surprised.  Tiffani couldn't sleep.  She explains her worry about this case: At first, her fear was that Britney might have accidentally scratched Ariel and used the paranormal activity as an excuse.  If this were what happened, should she contact Child Protective Services?  She was hoping that Philip would figure out what was causing the activity and Tiffani wouldn't need to make that decision.  But now she's worried about another possibility, one that's not as black-and-white as "a mom accidentally scratched her child".  Philip knows what she means, the option they were all avoiding, the possibility of a poltergeist scenario.  Tiffani wants them to investigate Saturday.  Philip can't... Unless...

Scene 20:

Saturday, In the Studio, 5:46 pm - The Movie Review show wraps up, and AMBER is super flattering to PHILIP about his segments.  He thanks her, but he really has to get to work.  She understands.

In Master Control, 5:58 pm - JAMES shows up, grumpy, to relieve Philip.  Philip thanks James profusely but James is pissed-off.

The Brimes Home - 6:37 pm - Philip arrives as CTPI has finished setting up.  The second investigation begins...

Scene 21:

Tuesday night - Philip meets with CTPI.  All evidence review provided nothing, nada, no evidence.  TIFFANI says they're going to have to investigate with Britney there.  NOEL and MAX don't understand.  Tiffani and PHILIP fill them in on their poltergeist hypothesis.  If Britney is poltergeist agent, why doesn't activity cease completely when she's not around?  One theory is that agent only amplifies activity that is present -- though, perhaps dormant -- before agent introduced to location.  So maybe agent stirred up activity so much that even when she's gone it's still going.  Even if that is the case, the activity should pick up when she's around.  Tiffani says they're going to need to talk Carlton into it.

Scene 22:

TIFFANI and PHILIP meet with CARLTON and explain the need to investigate with Britney present, but Carlton opposes vehemently.  They explain that this is the only way to verify that Britney isn't a poltergeist agent, and Carlton knows why they want her present, be he doesn't want this to happen.  He admits that since he wasn't a believer, once he became convinced this was all really happening he started reading up on this.  He has suspected for a while now that Britney might be a poltergeist agent, but he was hoping CTPI and Philip would prove him wrong.  He almost wishes it were demonic because if it were it could be exorcised, but now that they have proved his fears correct, he's calling off the case.  No more investigations.  If i is poltergeist and Britney is the agent, everything Carlton has read says that Britney needs to go to therapy, and he's not going to force her to do that.  Philip tries to explain that this is just a hypothesis, they have to prove it or disprove it still, but Carlton isn't having any of it.  "Please leave!"

Scene 23:

Thursday, at the TV Station - AMBER visits PHILIP.  She looked for him later Saturday night but found James working.  Philip explains that he had a paranormal investigation.  Amber didn't know that Philip did that, and they discuss what paranormal investigation involves.  Philip says this investigation is over, but it's still nagging at him.  He can't share it with Amber -- confidentiality -- but there are just some things he wishes he had the answers to.  Amber goes back home, leaving on a promising note.  (Maybe Philip gets the sense that he could have kissed her if he had just gone for it.)

Scene 24:

Friday, before work - MAX calls PHILIP.  She's bummed about the case.  This was the first time she had been scared since she started investigating six years ago and she wanted to find out what was going on.  Noel mentioned that Philip asked him about UFO reports; s'up with that?  Philip explains that sometimes ley lines converge and create a vortex, an opening point from other "dimensions" (for lack of a better word).  At these points, you tend to get ALL kinds of activity.  And when that happens, that patch of land tends to have a very, very long history or activity, going all the way back to...  Philip has an idea, can he call her back later?

Friday, TV Station, News Room - PHILIP asks reporter NATALIE HAMMOND if she can look into police reports from Brimes neighborhood between 1990 and 2000.  She asks if he's looking for anything in particular, but he's interested if she find anything at all.

Scene 25:

Tuesday - TIFFANI calls PHILIP.  It was Britney.  While she was bathing Ariel in the master bathroom, she heard a loud bang from Ariel's room, and when Carlton went in to see what had happened, Ariel's crib was upside down against the wall, as though someone had thrown it there.  The Brimes family wants CTPI to come back, and Britney has agreed to be present.  They want to know what's going on in their home.

Scene 26:

Thursday, At the TV Station - PHILIP asks JAMES to fill in...again.  James begins a long, loud rant about how much he hates working and how self-centered Philip is for asking James to fill in and--  James holds up a bottle of Tito's Handmade Vodka in a velvet gift bag...and a bottle of Mr & Mrs T Bold & Spicy Bloody Mary mix.  James, accepts them and says filling in on Saturday won't be a problem at all.

Philip tells AMBER he needs Saturday off.  She tells him he's off the show.  (She can't fire him because they are both  employed by the station to do other jobs, to they are both, technically,  volunteers on the show.)  She's not cruel about it, and she believes that PHILIP believes in this paranormal stuff, but she believes in her show.  Now he has all the time he needs.

Scene 27:

Brimes Home, 5:15 pm - TIFFANI is listening to BRITNEY explain what happened Tuesday night.  PHILIP observes them while NOEL and MAX set up the equipment.  Footsteps can be heard running down the hall.  Philip had an audio recorder rolling in Ariel's room; it should have picked the sound up.  Tiffani confers with Philip: The investigation hasn't even begun and the activity has already started.  Philip observes that that doesn't prove Britney is a poltergeist agent, and Tiffani concurs, "But it doesn't prove she's not, either."

Scene 28:

6:31 pm - At dinner, MAX coos over the salad.  Britney beams that they're from Carlton's garden.  She says that Ariel doesn't like vegetables, but she love's Carlton's tomatoes.  Carlton tells the story of how he had Ariel in the garden with him while he worked, and she was tearing out cherry tomatoes by the handful...  Not s much to eat them as to play with them.  Britney excuses herself from the room.  Philip asks when this was.  Carlton recalls it was probably 3 months ago.  Around the time when she was scratched?  Come to think of it, yes, around that time, why?  Did Carlton pick these vegetables earlier today?  No, he picked them Tuesday; they've been sitting in the refrigerator since then so he thought he make a salad out of them tonight.  The friend who was shoved in the guest bathroom, had Carlton shown him the garden?  Carlton can't remember, probably, why?  Parent's bedroom door SLAMS, scaring everyone out of their seats.

Scene 29:

6:39 pm - In the study, everyone watches again and again as NOEL replays the video of the Parents' Bedroom door slamming shut all by itself.  BRITNEY walks out of the bedroom, then 12 seconds later the door slams shut.  Britney has no idea how that happened.  CARLTON says that door never opens or closes by itself.  TIFFANI wants to ask Britney some questions.  Everyone clears the Study and Tiffani begins asking how Britney is doing, if she had been feeling stressed before this stuff started happening, if Britney can remember hearing or seeing things as a kid that grownups told her was her imagination, and so on...  PHILIP knows the drill and takes this opportunity to sneak out.  Minutes later he slips into the Kitchen, holding a flower, and listens for a few minutes as MAX conducts an EVP session.  Then Philip slips quietly out of the kitchen and walks down the hall toward Ariel's room.  He trips and face-plants on the ground, dropping the flower.  Tiffani and Britney rush up to him, they saw it on the monitor.  No one can find what Philip tripped on.  Philip also can't find the flower he had dropped.

Scene 30:

10:02 pm - PHILIP walks into the kitchen to find BRITNEY staring, silent.  He asks what's up and Britney asks doesn't he see her.  Her?  Britney points.  Philip doesn't see anything.  Britney insists that "she" is right there!  Philip walks slowly toward the spot, his hand outstretched, feeling.  Philip stops cold when he feels a tiny hand grab his own hand.  He reacts physically and AT THE SAME TIME Britney says, "Did you feel that?  She just grabbed your hand!"

Scene 31:

10:07 pm - Excited, PHILIP brings BRITNEY into the Storage Room.  He tries to speak to whoever is in here.  Britney doesn't want to be in here; she's terrified.  Philip assures her that whoever is in here can't hurt her.  "Can you, little boy?"  No response.  "Little boys can't hurt anyone, can they, little boy?"  The angry BOY with the glowing red eyes appears.  "Ime nodda lil boy.  Ime da debbul."  A loud banging grows inside the room.  Britney flees.  Max and Carlton poke their heads in.  But Philip stands there until the banging abruptly stops.

Scene 32:

11:14 pm - In the Study, PHILIP keeps replaying the audio of "Ime da debbul" over and over again.  NOEL asks him to stop it.  He offers to help them pack the gear up, but it's almost already finished.  CARLTON is barely containing his anger; what did Philip think he was doing in there?  But Philip is giddy.  "Mr. Brimes, you and your family have nothing to fear here.  When we come back, I will have answers for you, and I don't believe you or Britney or Ariel will ever be bothered again."

Scene 33:

Reporter NATALIE HAMMOND finds PHILIP at work.  She hands him a printout of what she's found, and she also emailed it to him, but she wanted to be sure this is what he was looking for.  Philip thinks this might be exactly what he was looking for and thanks her profusely.

Scene 34:

PHILIP knocks on XAVIER's door.  He has some questions about Elementals, nature spirits.  Xavier asks, "What do you want to know?

In the Brimes garden, Philip makes an offering of milk, honey, bread, coffee beans and tobacco to the Elemental, explaining that the Elemental is welcome outside the house, and the family will not disturb this garden again.  But inside the house is for the family, and the Elemental is not welcome there.  He then explains to Carlton that if he does any more gardening, he needs to respectfully ask permission to disturb the land, and he need to ask permission to pick anything he has planted.  If he ever feels unwelcome in the garden, he should leave and try coming back later.  But as long as he is respectful, he shouldn't have any problems in Areil's room again.

Scene 35:

In the Storage Room, PHILIP asks POE if he's protecting his sister Doddy.  The banging in the room begins.  Philip is patient, understanding.  he explains that he is not here to hurt Poe or Doddy.  In fact, nobody can hurt either of them any more.  They are free.  They don't have to stay in this house if they don't want to.  They can go where ever they want.  But whether they go somewhere else or stay here, no one can hurt either of them.  They are safe.  Poe don't need to protect Doddy anymore.  Poe has done a really, really great job at being strong for his sister, but they are both safe now.  BRITNEY starts crying.  CARLTON asks what's wrong.  Britney says that, for no reason, she suddenly feels a sense of relief.

Scene 36:

PHILIP explains all.  The BRIMES Family is safe here.

Scene 37:

TIFFANI and PHILIP are having lunch to discuss how the Brimes family is doing now.  Tiffani asks how the movie-review show is going; Philip says that Amber isn't speaking to him; she's not being rude, but it's like he kind of doesn't exist to her anymore.  Tiffani asks Philip one final question about the Brimes case...

The Jeet Kune Do Scene

Came up with another scene.  I'll call it "Scene 13a" for now.

I spent yesterday (Monday...  Since I haven't been to sleep yet, this is still "Tuesday" to me) considering whether or not I should go ahead and start my first draft with the outline as it is.  Do I need one more scene for Investigation #2 and three more scenes before wrapping up the mystery?

I don't think so.  I think the second investigation contains all the information and action it needs, and the only reason to put off the wrap-up of the story would be if I could intensify the novel one more notch before letting everybody off the hook.

And I don't think I can do that.  (Not until after I've finished an read the first draft, anyway.)

It'll mean I need to average about 2,223 words per chapter (instead of 2,000 words per chapter) to achieve my goal of no less than 80,0000 words, but I'll bet I can manage.

Actually, now it's 2,163 words per chapter.

It occurred to me on the way home from work this morning that I might want to put Philip in at least one non-paranormal physical confrontation.  Most "heroes" can kick ass, and Philip can, too, but he never (almost never) gets himself into a situation that requires him to fight.  However, it might be useful for my Reader to know that Philip CAN fight, when necessary.  (Because he's a smart guy, it's just never necessary.)

So as I played this scene out in my mind -- What would Philip do when confronted with a drunken, testosterone-riddled Alpha male? -- I have him not punching his attacker, but simply not-being-punched by his attacker.  As I would do.  My brother taught me Jeet Kune Do about 18 years ago, and I have yet to need it.  I mean, I use the philosophies that underlie Bruce Lee's fighting techniques, but I've never been forced to so much a block a punch.  In THE TAO OF JEET JUNE DO, Bruce emphasizes several times that the best fighter knows how to avoid fighting.  But Jeet Kune Do can be applied to every physical move you make, the way you look at any situation, the way you choose to respond to any problem.  In an interview, when asked if he used is father's fighting style (meaning Jeet Kune Do) Brandon Lee said it wasn't so much a fighting style as a philosophy for living, and I believe that can easily be true.  But if I ever get into a fight, my weapon of choice is Jeet Kune Do.

But in particular, I was thinking about the way you can use Jeet Kune Do to manipulate your opponent's body against his will.  He can jab you in the chest, and it will hurt.  But he's only jabbing you with the force of his finger, wrist, forearm, and maybe his bicep.  You, however, can press on his chest with the force of your toes, feet, ankles, calves, thighs, hips, torso, shoulder, bicep, forearm, wrist and finger, and push him totally off his balance.

To any onlookers, you both did the same thing.  But you remained immobile and he feinted backward like you're finger weighs a hundred tons.

You're doing the same thing as Lee's One-Inch Punch: You're channeling the power from most of the muscles in your body into your finger, and instead of aiming for his chest, you're aiming BEHIND his chest.  But anyone watching sees the exact same motion.

It's kind of like magic...

...and that's when I realized the true value of this scene!  :D

CHI!  Bruce Lee -- ALL martial artists -- talk about Chi, the subtle energy that flows through our bodies.  It's not scientifically proven, but Western Medicine is no longer able to deny the observable effects of Eastern treatments like acupuncture and acupressure!  Yoga is in an upswing of popularity, and that's about getting the Chi flowing properly!

With this one scene -- initially intended to make sure more mainstream readers don't think my protagonist is an egg-head wimp -- I can convey SO MUCH about paranormal investigation!

With Bruce Lee's One-Inch Punch, does it work because he's channeling his Chi, or does it work because he's using more muscles than the ordinary person?  He said it was both.  Or could it be a psychological effect?  (You think you're able to channel more power into your finger, fist, whatever, and therefor you, somehow, are able?)

THAT is what paranormal investigation IS!  We don't know what's going on or how it works, but we're exploring theories, some of them scientific and some of them ancient folk wisdom, and just trying to collect more data so that we might one day understand the phenomena better!  :D

And if I write the scene right, I don't even have to make a particularly obvious link between the two for the benefit to carry over to the rest of the book in the reader's subconscious!

I may make it obvious for the first draft, just to see how it goes over with my Beta Readers.  But just explaining a little bit about how some apparently "mystical" martial arts techniques work will do the job of making some of the rest of the stuff toward the end of the novel seem a bit more plausible, even to a non-investigator!  :D

Writing!

It's kind of like magic!

Outline 007

PHILIP BLACKWOOD MYSTERIES #1

Outline 007

Sc 01 - BRITNEY BRIMES (25) is in the kitchen and sees a LITTLE BOY out of the corner of her eye.  She doesn't hear anything, just turns to see the boy running out of the kitchen.

Britney follows the boy, but he's not in the living room.  She walks on to the storage room, and finds the Little Boy standing there, staring at her, looking unhappy.  She tells him she's seen the little girl, but never seen him.  The Little Boy doesn't answer.

Does he know the little girl?  Is he is her friend?

The Little Boy says, "I'm not a boy," his voice deepens, his eyes become dark sockets, and he morphs, "I'm the Debbul."

Britney screams and flees.

Sc 02 - PHILIP BLACKWOOD (26) arrives at MISTY's house.  He has brought XAVIER, Misty's neighbor, with him.  Philip explains to Xavier that Misty has been bothered by monthly thumps on her roof that she feared were paranormal.  Xavier laughs, and also seems embarrassed about this.  Philip takes Misty and Xavier out front to show Misty the tree at the edge of Xavier's back yard that hangs over the edge of her roof.  He explains that Xavier has a cat who, once a month when the moon is full, freaks out, climbs the tree and scampers across Misty's roof to get to the Benny family's back yard.  The Benny's have two cats that Xavier's cat, Lilith Puffysox, likes to play with.  But Philip suggests that Xavier explains WHY this happens every full moon... Xavier has a garden in his back yard, and he is Wiccan.  Every full moon he performs a ritual inviting the gnomes to bless his garden.  This activity freaks Lilith Puffysox right out, so she escapes Xavier's yard to play with the Benny's cats, and shows up the next morning on Xavier's doorstep.  MISTY has no idea Xavier was a witch; she and Xavier strike up a friendship.  Philip's phone rings: TIFFANI needs a favor.

Sc 03 - TIFFANI meets PHILIP at a food cart.  She asks how the movie-review show is going and Philip says it's fine.  Tiffani says Max and Noel miss him; he misses them, too.  Yeah?  Yeah, Philip misses all of it, the coffee, the sitting for hours in the dark, trying to act like a responsible adult around clinets, meetings at (insert cool Austin restaurant), the whole thing.  Tiffani asks if he can help them out with one more case.  Philip jokingly asks is there's any chance it's on a weeknight and Tiffani says "no" but rushes into the pitch: The Brimes Family are being tormented, but the group -- Central Texas Paranormal Investigators (CTPI) -- can't solve it.  It's too powerful to be residual or intelligent ghosts, it is actually hurting the family and their daughter, but 2 religious cleansings have failed to exile whatever it is, and no Catholic churches in the Central Texas area will area will sanction an official cleansing.  Philip wants to help, but James (the other overnight guy) hates working on his days off and Saturday is when they tape the show.  But Philip can see that Tiffani is really, really hoping for Philip's help, so he offers to look at the evidence CTPI has collected.

Sc 04 - PHILIP review's evidence:

1. A little girl, DODDY, actually converses with the team for a couple of minutes.
2. An inhuman growl is heard in EVP.
3. A night table in the baby's room is moved 17 inches on video.
4. A small shadow turns into a large, menacing shadow on IR video.

Philip is intrigued enough to help.

Sc 05 - TIFFANI takes PHILIP to meet CARLTON BRIMES.  Britney and Ariel are at Britney's mothers.  If possible, Carlton would rather wrap this up before Ariel comes home.  (This is unrealistic, but Philip holds his tongue, though Tiffani is uncomfortable with this unrealistic expectation, too, he can tell.)

Ariel's Room: Ariel scratched, furniture moving.
Kitchen: Little girl seen.
Storage room: Little boy turns into "the devil".  Growl EVP.
Parents' bedroom: Aural conversation with Doddy.
Parents' bathroom: Banging on inside, not heard outside.
Guest bathroom (near Ariel's room): Guest pushed into shower.
Hallway: Shadow IR video.

Sc 06 - Thursday Night - As soon JAMES gets in PHILIP begs him to cover Saturday.  James obviously wants to say "no", argues in his head for a few minutes, then says he'll do it.  RELIEF!  Philip tracks down AMBER.  They banter (maybe even flirt?) for a bit, then Philip dives in: He gives her a jump drive with his scripts and video and begs her to forgive him for not being able to make it Saturday.  Amber becomes an ice queen.  Philip tries to explain that he wouldn't do this if he had a choice, and Amber informs him he doesn't.  She's barely holding this show together, scrounging every bit of advertising she can con out of someone because the General Manager keeps hinting the show doesn't make enough money to keep it on the air, and now Philip is bailing, too?  He's not bailing, he just can be here Saturday.  "That's fine", Amber says, but Philip knows it's not fine.

Sc 07 - PHILIP meets TIFFANI to talk about the case.  He's going to tell her that can continue helping them on his days off, reviewing evidence or whatever he can do, but he just can't get the time off work, but Tiffani launches right in with the background: New house, no recorded deaths or psychic trauma.  Whole neighborhood was an empty field before that.  This fact interests Philip, but he won't say why just yet, he's still going to beg off the case.  Tiffani is worried this might be "inhuman", but since "civilian" cleansings didn't work, there might be nothing CTPI can do for the Brimes family.  (During their, the 2nd, cleansing, CTPI utilized an ordained minister, so they're up against the wall.)  There is another aspect that makes Tiffani want to solve the case for the Brimes family, but she doesn't want to taint Philip's opinion.  Philip starts to explain that he can't do it, but the look on Tiffani's face won't let him.

Sc 08 - 6:00 pm - PHILIP, TIFFANI, MAX and NOEL arrive to investigate Brimes house.  Philip mentions that he thinks it would be really helpful to talk to Britney Brimes, and that seems to make CARLTON really, really nervous.  (This happens over dinner.)

Sc 09 - 6:55 pm - Setup happens, PHILIP & TIFFANI investigate Ariel's Room while MAX and NOEL investigate the Storage Room.  45 minutes of nothing.  (7:45 pm) TIFFANI and PHILIP investigate Parents' Bedroom while MAX and NOEL investigate Parents' Bathroom.  Another 45 minutes of nothing.  (8:37 pm) PHILIP and MAX investigate Guest Bathroom while NOEL fast-forwards through what they have of the Hallway so far and TIFFANI checks her audio to see if she has anything.  45 more minutes of nothing.

Sc 10 - 9:24 pm - CARLTON has been surfing the Net in the Study for the last two-and-a-half hours.  He seems nervous (acting suspicious) when PHILIP tells him they haven't found anything yet.  Philip mentions this.  Carlton explains that he never believed in this stuff before, and he's still not comfortable with it now.  But since...since he can't deny it now, he's been noticing all kinds of strange things.  He thought he saw...no, he's sure he saw a black panther at the edge of his property one night, only twice as large as a doberman, maybe larger.  Britney has always been interested in this stuff, as Philip can tell from her DVDs, and a giant back cat doesn't figure into it.  Philip explains that that's not unheard of in the paranormal world, but he senses that there is more to Carlton's unease.  Carlton is hiding something.

Sc 11 - 9:30 pm - Noel volunteers to watch the cameras (set up in the Study) while PHILIP, TIFFANI and MAX investigate the Kitchen.  Tiffani leads the EVP session, trying to engage Doddy.  Tiffani's questions are about what it was like when Doddy lived here.  After no responses, Max asks how Doddy died.  (Philip thinks this question is a mistake, but doesn't say anything.)  Max suddenly can't breathe.  They end the session and leave the room, and Max gets her breath back.

Sc 12 - 9:51 pm - CARLTON is worried that maybe they should end the investigation for tonight.  MAX absolutely does not want to!  NOEL worries about an entity that would attack Max.  Is it, maybe, that dark thing they saw in the hall last time?  The thing that growled?  (Assuming they are the same entity.)  MAX is excited they're getting a response; it it wants to attack her again, she's not scared.  TIFFANI doesn't want CTPI to stir up anything that they can't deal with, and then leave Carlton here alone afterward.  PHILIP suspects it wasn't an attack: He points out that Max asked how Doddy died; maybe Doddy was "showing" her.

Sc 13 - 10:01 pm - PHILIP, TIFFANI, MAX, NOEL and CARLTON are all in the Kitchen trying to contact Doddy.  10:44 pm rolls around with no results.  10:49 - 11:30 pm PHILIP and MAX investigate Ariel's room.  11:40 pm - 12:25 am PHILIP and NOEL investigate the Storage Room.  12:35 - 1:20 am PHILIP and TIFFANI sit quietly in the Hallway.  At 1:48 am Philip and CTPI have packed-up and leave CARLTON, Tiffani insisting he call her cell phone if anything happens or if Carlton needs anything.  They'll review the audio and video they caught tonight and let him know.  As Max and Noel drive off, Tiffani asks what Philip thinks.  He'll let the data inform his opinion, but right now he doesn't see anything especially odd about this haunting.  Tiffani isn't pleased with this assessment -- she clearly wants Philip to come to some specific conclusion about this case, but she won't tell Philip what's bothering her.

Sc 14 - Sunday night - PHILIP works.

Monday evening - Philip begins reviewing his audio and makes notes.  He gets about halfway through it because he places audio recorders in room where he isn't.

Monday night - TIFFANI calls to see if Philip has found anything.  She and the others found nothing, so far.  Some possible EVPs and a few "orbs" in pictures (probably dust), but nothing of interest.  However, Tiffani did some research and found out that there was a low-rent apartment complex on the land for a couple of years before the land was bought by the Tiger Group out of Japan.  (1995 - 2001)  This get's Philip's attention.  He asks her if she will keep digging, and if Noel can check out UFO reports in that area while she's doing that.  Tiffani asks what Philip is thinking but he's not sure it's even worth mentioning.

Sc 15 - Tuesday night - PHILIP hears an inhuman growl uttering "GET OUT!" from the recorder in the Parent's Bathroom.  He checks the time; it's right around when Max couldn't breath in the Kitchen.  He checks the time on his audio recording of the Kitchen incident: It's an exact match!  He picks up his phone to call Tiffani, but his phone rings right at that instant: It's NOEL...  Noel has an EVP from the Storage Room that Philip needs to hear...

Sc 16 - Wednesday evening - PHILIP meets CTPI at TIFFANI's house.  NOEL feels that the identical EVPs happening at the exact moment when Max couldn't breath indicates she was attacked.  MAX is uncharacteristically scared by the EVPs.  Philip points out "Then why didn't the religious ceremonies work?"  So, Noel wants to know, what's Philip's theory.  Philip doesn't have one yet, he's still analyzing the facts.  Noel spells out the case for demonic infestation:

1. Ariel scratched
2. Little boy turns into "The Devil"
3. Parents' bathroom banging
4. Guest pushed into shower
5. Inhuman growl EVP
6. Night table in Ariel's room moves 17 inches
7. Small shadow turns into Large shadow
8. "Get out!" and Max can't breathe
9. Demons reported to pretend to be ghosts of children

But the religious cleansings would have worked if it were demonic.  Tiffani talked to Carlton earlier today and there wasn't anything going on in the house since the investigation, so they still have time to figure this out.  They just need to investigate again.  But Philip can't take another day off work...

Sc 17 - Thursday - At the TV station, PHILIP visits AMBER's office.  He wants to apologize again for Saturday.  Amber apologizes instead for her behavior: Amber is barely holding this show together, scrounging every bit of advertising she can con out of someone because the General Manager keeps hinting the show doesn't make enough money to keep it on the air, and Philip not showing up Saturday seemed like maybe he sensed the ship was sinking and was going overboard before it sank beneath them all.  A little flirtatiously, Amber asks if Philip DVR-ed the show.  He did, and he loved her changes to his segments.  Amber says she had to tweak his scripts a little because the way he writes is so... HIM.  (She makes it sound like a compliment...and maybe a come-on.)  Philip has to get back to work.

Sc 18 - At work, PHILIP checks his emails.  He got an email from Noel listing the UFO reports in the area: One witness spotted lights in the sky twice this year.  Two witnesses spotted a craft here last year. One spotted lights last year.  Another 3 spotted lights 4 years ago.

TIFFANI stops by the TV station.  Philip is surprised.  Tiffani couldn't sleep.  She explains her worry about this case: At first, her fear was that Britney might have accidentally scratched Ariel and used the paranormal activity as an excuse.  If this were what happened, should she contact Child Protective Services?  She was hoping that Philip would figure out what was causing the activity and Tiffani wouldn't need to make that decision.  But now she's worried about another possibility, one that's not as black-and-white as "a mom accidentally scratched her child".  Philip knows what she means, the option they were all avoiding, the possibility of a poltergeist scenario.  Tiffani wants them to investigate Saturday.  Philip can't... Unless...

Sc 19 - Saturday, In the Studio, 5:46 pm - The Movie Review show wraps up, and AMBER is super flattering to PHILIP about his segments.  He thanks her, but he really has to get to work.  She understands.

In Master Control, 5:58 pm - JAMES shows up, grumpy, to relieve Philip.  Philip thanks James profusely but James is pissed-off.

The Brimes Home - 6:37 pm - Philip arrives as CTPI has finished setting up.  The second investigation begins...

Sc 20 - Tuesday night - Philip meets with CTPI.  All evidence review provided nothing, nada, no evidence.  TIFFANI says they're going to have to investigate with Britney there.  NOEL and MAX don't understand.  Tiffani and PHILIP fill them in on their poltergeist hypothesis.  If Britney is poltergeist agent, why doesn't activity cease completely when she's not around?  One theory is that agent only amplifies activity that is present -- though, perhaps dormant -- before agent introduced to location.  So maybe agent stirred up activity so much that even when she's gone it's still going.  Even if that is the case, the activity should pick up when she's around.  Tiffani says they're going to need to talk Carlton into it.

Sc 21 - TIFFANI and PHILIP meet with CARLTON and explain the need to investigate with Britney present, but Carlton opposes vehemently.  They explain that this is the only way to verify that Britney isn't a poltergeist agent, and Carlton knows why they want her present, be he doesn't want this to happen.  He admits that since he wasn't a believer, once he became convinced this was all really happening he started reading up on this.  He has suspected for a while now that Britney might be a poltergeist agent, but he was hoping CTPI and Philip would prove him wrong.  He almost wishes it were demonic because if it were it could be exorcised, but now that they have proved his fears correct, he's calling off the case.  No more investigations.  If i is poltergeist and Britney is the agent, everything Carlton has read says that Britney needs to go to therapy, and he's not going to force her to do that.  Philip tries to explain that this is just a hypothesis, they have to prove it or disprove it still, but Carlton isn't having any of it.  "Please leave!"

Sc 22 - Thursday, at the TV Station - AMBER visits PHILIP.  She looked for him later Saturday night but found James working.  Philip explains that he had a paranormal investigation.  Amber didn't know that Philip did that, and they discuss what paranormal investigation involves.  Philip says this investigation is over, but it's still nagging at him.  He can't share it with Amber -- confidentiality -- but there are just some things he wishes he had the answers to.  Amber goes back home, leaving on a promising note.  (Maybe Philip gets the sense that he could have kissed her if he had just gone for it.)

Sc 23 - Friday, before work - MAX calls PHILIP.  She's bummed about the case.  This was the first time she had been scared since she started investigating six years ago and she wanted to find out what was going on.  Noel mentioned that Philip asked him about UFO reports; s'up with that?  Philip explains that sometimes ley lines converge and create a vortex, an opening point from other "dimensions" (for lack of a better word).  At these points, you tend to get ALL kinds of activity.  And when that happens, that patch of land tends to have a very, very long history or activity, going all the way back to...  Philip has an idea, can he call her back later?

Friday, TV Station, News Room - PHILIP asks reporter NATALIE HAMMOND if she can look into police reports from Brimes neighborhood between 1990 and 2000.  She asks if he's looking for anything in particular, but he's interested if she find anything at all.

Sc 24 - Tuesday - TIFFANI calls PHILIP.  It was Britney.  While she was bathing Ariel in the master bathroom, she heard a loud bang from Ariel's room, and when Carlton went in to see what had happened, Ariel's crib was upside down against the wall, as though someone had thrown it there.  The Brimes family wants CTPI to come back, and Britney has agreed to be present.  They want to know what's going on in their home.

Sc 25 - Thursday, At the TV Station - PHILIP asks JAMES to fill in...again.  James begins a long, loud rant about how much he hates working and how self-centered Philip is for asking James to fill in and--  James holds up a bottle of Tito's Handmade Vodka in a velvet gift bag...and a bottle of Mr & Mrs T Bold & Spicy Bloody Mary mix.  James, accepts them and says filling in on Saturday won't be a problem at all.

Philip tells AMBER he needs Saturday off.  She tells him he's off the show.  (She can't fire him because they are both  employed by the station to do other jobs, to they are both, technically,  volunteers on the show.)  She's not cruel about it, and she believes that PHILIP believes in this paranormal stuff, but she believes in her show.  Now he has all the time he needs.

Sc 26 - Brimes Home, 5:15 pm - TIFFANI is listening to BRITNEY explain what happened Tuesday night.  PHILIP observes them while NOEL and MAX set up the equipment.  Footsteps can be heard running down the hall.  Philip had an audio recorder rolling in Ariel's room; it should have picked the sound up.  Tiffani confers with Philip: The investigation hasn't even begun and the activity has already started.  Philip observes that that doesn't prove Britney is a poltergeist agent, and Tiffani concurs, "But it doesn't prove she's not, either."

Sc 27 - 6:31 pm - At dinner, MAX coos over the salad.  Britney beams that they're from Carlton's garden.  She says that Ariel doesn't like vegetables, but she love's Carlton's tomatoes.  Carlton tells the story of how he had Ariel in the garden with him while he worked, and she was tearing out cherry tomatoes by the handful...  Not s much to eat them as to play with them.  Britney excuses herself from the room.  Philip asks when this was.  Carlton recalls it was probably 3 months ago.  Around the time when she was scratched?  Come to think of it, yes, around that time, why?  Did Carlton pick these vegetables earlier today?  No, he picked them Tuesday; they've been sitting in the refrigerator since then so he thought he make a salad out of them tonight.  The friend who was shoved in the guest bathroom, had Carlton shown him the garden?  Carlton can't remember, probably, why?  Parent's bedroom door SLAMS, scaring everyone out of their seats.

Sc 28 - 6:39 pm - In the study, everyone watches again and again as NOEL replays the video of the Parents' Bedroom door slamming shut all by itself.  BRITNEY walks out of the bedroom, then 12 seconds later the door slams shut.  Britney has no idea how that happened.  CARLTON says that door never opens or closes by itself.  TIFFANI wants to ask Britney some questions.  Everyone clears the Study and Tiffani begins asking how Britney is doing, if she had been feeling stressed before this stuff started happening, if Britney can remember hearing or seeing things as a kid that grownups told her was her imagination, and so on...  PHILIP knows the drill and takes this opportunity to sneak out.  Minutes later he slips into the Kitchen, holding a flower, and listens for a few minutes as MAX conducts an EVP session.  Then Philip slips quietly out of the kitchen and walks down the hall toward Ariel's room.  He trips and face-plants on the ground, dropping the flower.  Tiffani and Britney rush up to him, they saw it on the monitor.  No one can find what Philip tripped on.  Philip also can't find the flower he had dropped.

Sc 29 -

Sc 30 - 10:02 pm - PHILIP walks into the kitchen to find BRITNEY staring, silent.  He asks what's up and Britney asks doesn't he see her.  Her?  Britney points.  Philip doesn't see anything.  Britney insists that "she" is right there!  Philip walks slowly toward the spot, his hand outstretched, feeling.  Philip stops cold when he feels a tiny hand grab his own hand.  He reacts physically and AT THE SAME TIME Britney says, "Did you feel that?  She just grabbed your hand!"

Sc 31 - 10:07 pm - Excited, PHILIP brings BRITNEY into the Storage Room.  He tries to speak to whoever is in here.  Britney doesn't want to be in here; she's terrified.  Philip assures her that whoever is in here can't hurt her.  "Can you, little boy?"  No response.  "Little boys can't hurt anyone, can they, little boy?"  The angry BOY with the glowing red eyes appears.  "Ime nodda lil boy.  Ime da debbul."  A loud banging grows inside the room.  Britney flees.  Max and Carlton poke their heads in.  But Philip stands there until the banging abruptly stops.

Sc 32 - 11:14 pm - In the Study, PHILIP keeps replaying the audio of "Ime da debbul" over and over again.  NOEL asks him to stop it.  He offers to help them pack the gear up, but it's almost already finished.  CARLTON is barely containing his anger; what did Philip think he was doing in there?  But Philip is giddy.  "Mr. Brimes, you and your family have nothing to fear here.  When we come back, I will have answers for you, and I don't believe you or Britney or Ariel will ever be bothered again."

Sc 33 -
Sc 34 -
Sc 35 -
Sc 36 - Reporter NATALIE HAMMOND finds PHILIP at work.  She hands him a printout of what she's found, and she also emailed it to him, but she wanted to be sure this is what he was looking for.  Philip thinks this might be exactly what he was looking for and thanks her profusely.

Sc 37 - PHILIP knocks on XAVIER's door.  He has some questions about Elementals, nature spirits.  Xavier asks, "What do you want to know?

In the Brimes garden, Philip makes an offering of milk, honey, bread, coffee beans and tobacco to the Elemental, explaining that the Elemental is welcome outside the house, and the family will not disturb this garden again.  But inside the house is for the family, and the Elemental is not welcome there.  He then explains to Carlton that if he does any more gardening, he needs to respectfully ask permission to disturb the land, and he need to ask permission to pick anything he has planted.  If he ever feels unwelcome in the garden, he should leave and try coming back later.  But as long as he is respectful, he shouldn't have any problems in Areil's room again.

Sc 38 - In the Storage Room, PHILIP asks POE if he's protecting his sister Doddy.  The banging in the room begins.  Philip is patient, understanding.  he explains that he is not here to hurt Poe or Doddy.  In fact, nobody can hurt either of them any more.  They are free.  They don't have to stay in this house if they don't want to.  They can go where ever they want.  But whether they go somewhere else or stay here, no one can hurt either of them.  They are safe.  Poe don't need to protect Doddy anymore.  Poe has done a really, really great job at being strong for his sister, but they are both safe now.  BRITNEY starts crying.  CARLTON asks what's wrong.  Britney says that, for no reason, she suddenly feels a sense of relief.

Sc 39 - PHILIP explains all.  The BRIMES Family is safe here.

Sc 40 - TIFFANI and PHILIP are having lunch to discuss how the Brimes family is doing now.  Tiffani asks how the movie-review show is going; Philip says that Amber isn't speaking to him; she's not being rude, but it's like he kind of doesn't exist to her anymore.  Tiffani asks Philip one final question about the Brimes case...

A Day of Writing

10:27 pm

Woke up after 8:00 pm (NICE sleep!  Very refreshing.) and finished watching JESSE STONE: SEA CHANGE.  I fell asleep watching it this morning.

I've got steamed veggies with pasta and garlic/cheddar biscuits for breakfast, but I thought I would start this blog entry first.  This is more for me than you, curious reader, because I want to map out what a day of writing might look like, you know, once I'm able to do this professionally.

The first thing I want to do is read my blog posts from last night/this morning, to catch me up on my thought process.

But first, I should probably eat.

Actually, I'm gonna jot down some place-holder scene descriptions...

Scene 24:

TIFFANI calls PHILIP.  Something scary happened to the Brimes family, they want CTPI to investigate and Britney will be there.

Scene 25:

PHILIP shows up at the TV station to bribe JAMES and tell AMBER he needs Saturday off.

She tells him he's off the show.  (She can't fire him because they are both employed by the station to do other jobs, to they are both, technically, volunteers on the show.)  She's not cruel, and she believes that PHILIP believes in this paranormal stuff, but she believes in her show.  Now he has all the time he needs.

Scene 26:

CTPI and PHILIP arrive at the Brimes house.  Update on current activity.  Activity is already happening before the investigation starts.  It looks like BRITNEY is a poltergeist agent.

Scene 27:

Scene 28:

 

Scene 29:

11:36 pm

Okay, now let's see if I can flesh out the place-holder scenes, and maybe complete this section of the outline...

Scene 24 is Tiffani calling Philip and telling him that Cartlon Brimes wants them back on the case.

Why?

Clearly, something scary happened to them.

What?

The details are god here.  We want something that is unnerving for the Reader to even think about.  I also think it should be physical force.

In my mind, this phenomena is broken up into 2 categories:

1. Ghost children
2. Elemental

The double-EVP was Poe being scary.  And the physical force is the Elemental.  (Ghosts can't move heavy objects.  They can disappear stuff and make it reappear but then can't, say, move a couch across the room.)

So I need the Elemental to have done something scary.  The Elemental generally manifests in the baby's room, which works in my favor since anything danger that appears to threaten Ariel is disturbing, and therefor story gold.

But what?

THE CRIB GET'S VIOLENTLY UPENDED!!!  :D

Ariel isn't in it, so she's not hurt, of course.  But how fucking disturbing would that be?  Any parent would be able to think only one thought: "What if she had been in the crib when it happened?!"  I don't think you even have to be a parent to be disturbed by that!

Scene 24:

TIFFANI calls PHILIP.  It was Britney.  While she was bathing Ariel in the master bathroom, she heard a loud bang from Ariel's room, and when Carlton went in to see what had happened, Ariel's crib was upside down against the wall, as though someone had thrown it there.  The Brimes family wants CTPI to come back, and Britney has agreed to be present.  They want to know what's going on in their home.

HELLS YEAH!  THAT is how you flesh out a scene!  :D

Scene 25 is actually ready to be turned into pages, except for Philip's bribe for James.

I need to know more about James than I do.

James doesn't like to work on his days off because he has something he prefers to do at home.

My first instinct is to make it something quirky.  Like he spends a lot of time on Second Life.  Only, no one knows what Second Life is anymore; it's 15 Minutes of Fame seem to have passed.  And I'm given to understand that World of Warcraft might be similar to SL, but it's 15 Minutes seem to be more or less up, too.

There are multi-player war games, like CALL OF DUTY, that might work, except that I don't know anything about them.  And the don't, to my knowledge, work as a bribe.

See, the reason SL appeals to me is because you can buy stuff in SL, so Philip could have purchased something expensive for James in-world, so that the next time James goes in-world he could enjoy SL even more.

But, as I said, Second Life is too obscure for many of the readers (if any) to get the joke.

And the bribe should function as a joke.  The first time Philip asks James to fill in, the Reader is informed why James doesn't want to.  The next time, Philip regrets taking James away from whatever it is.  So this third time, Philip presents James with...whatever he presents him with, and without explanation, the Reader understands the bribe's significance and laughs at Philip's consideration.  Set up, set up, punch.

But what?

The weak version is just that James likes to drink on his days off, and the punchline would be Philip presenting him with a bottle of (very specific) booze.

But that's weak, and it doesn't make James any more interesting a character.

12:34 am

I decided to step away from the problem for a bit, then make some coffee.

I still don't know what James' hobby is, so I'm going to skip ahead to Scene 26.

Since Scene 30 is part of the investigation, getting Investigation #2 started in Scene 26 means I've got, at least, a 5-scene investigation.  So it's got to be good, or I lose my Readers at one of the points when they should be enjoying themselves the most.

Now this situation is helped by the fact that I feel very confident that Scene 30 will be an excellent Climax to Investigation #2.  It's sort of a penultimate Climax to the story as a whole.  So whatever happens in Scene 26 -- to let Philip and Tiffani know that the activity has definitely increased with Britney in the house -- doesn't have to be big, it only has to be creepy.

I think I should bring the garden outside Ariel's room into this investigation.  I would really like to plant the Elemental aspect here.

Ooh!  I got a great idea!  Maybe Philip doesn't make the offering to the Elemental in Scene 37...  Maybe he brings Xavier along to do that!  :D

I had considered a scene in either this stretch of the book or the last stretch in which Philip knocks on Xavier's door to ask him some leading questions about dealing with Elementals.  But if Xavier just shows up at the end of the story, I wonder if that might give the Reader a more powerful rush of insight and understanding.  A jolt of recognition when they remember all the way back to Scene 2.

It might not work.  If this were a film, it would work, because the moment they saw Xavier, they would wonder why he looked familiar, scan backward to the beginning of the film, then immediately figure out what is about to happen.

But novels are different from films in that the reader may plow right through to the end, or they may set the book down for days, weeks, even months at a time.

Although, if the Reader sets this book down for a week or more, I'm probably doomed, anyway.  I'm designing this book to be a tight, fast-paced read (I'm thinking each scene will be a chapter), so if the reader's attention wanders from the novel I probably haven't done my job well enough.

So if I wanted to play it safe, I would go back and include a scene where Philip talks to Xavier somewhere near the middle of the book, to reintroduce the reader to the character and suggest that he may still be important to the story.

In fact, talking about it, I may go ahead and do that.  The scene can always be cut at some later stage -- rewrite, editing -- but its absence might feel like a cheat.

The fun thing, though, for me is that Xavier wasn't invented for any significant role in the story!  He was just invented to introduce my protagonist!  :)

You know, thinking about it, maybe bringing Xavier along for the big Wrap Up isn't the best idea.

I could always have Philip visit Xavier and state that he wants to ask him some questions about Elementals, then "cut to" Philip at the Brimes home, performing the offering.

I mean, it should have the same effect on the Reader, if they recognize the character from the second chapter of the book, but it doesn't require them to remember Xavier in order to get understand what's going on i the scene.  So it's sort of like I'm insuring against non-recognition, without foreshadowing the solution to the mystery.

That seems like the best way to go.

Okay, back to what I was doing...

We've got a 5-scene investigation, and we know the last scene (Doddy touches Philips hand and Britney sees it happen).

Scene 1 - Activity has increased.
Scene 2 -
Scene 3 -
Scene 4 -
Scene 5 - The ghost girl touches Philips hand and Britney sees dead people.

I'd like to milk the poltergeist hypothesis as long as possible.

OH YEAH!

Side-tracking again:

I wanted a scene that mirrors the opening of the book, only Philip is one of the people who witness it!  This is the beginning of Philip solving the case!  Because Philip analyses the speech and discovers that the exact words aren't "I'm the devil" but "Ime da debbul", like they're being spoken by a young child.

In fact, I'm going to go ahead and put those scenes in my outline, because I know I want them...

1:33 am

I just fleshed out Scenes 37 and 38.  I really like them now.  I even made myself a little weepy writing Scene 38!  (That's always a nice accomplishment if you can do it!)

And I have 9 SCENES LEFT!!!  :D

Fewer than that, actually, but I need to flesh them out...

So what do I tackle first?  The investigation, or James' bribe?

I could go on the Internet and see if I can find a cool hobby idea.

I think I'll do that.  Research might refresh my mind a bit...

2:20 am

I now have a decent idea what Geocaching is, and am mildly fascinated by the concept...  But I haven't got a hobby for James yet.
Okay, the story-purpose for the hobby is:

1. Explain why James hates to work on his days off.
2. Make James a more interesting character.
3. Give Philip a way to compensate James for covering for him.


Just got a weak idea: James has a hot wife and he like to spend time with her, and that's why he doesn't like to work on his days off.  Philip could give him some exotic gift (like jewelry) to give to her.  But the problem is people who work overnight tend not to be married, or even be in serious, live-in relationships.  It's far from impossible, it just tends not to be the case.

Just realized that Scene 37 needs to be the reporter giving Philip the information about the kids who died on the property in 1998.  That needs to immediately proceed Philip talking to Xavier and then making an offering to the Elemental to confuse the Reader, but also set them up for Philip's Big Reveal in Scene 39...

3:31 am

I after updating the outline, I stepped outside to help my brother perform a minor adjustment to his car.  (He's not an overnight guy, but he's a night owl, too.)  And when I say that I helped, what I mean is that I held a flashlight and made sure ninjas or zombies didn't sneak up on him while he was working.

I also thought that an excuse to go outside and stop thinking about the novel for a bit might prove useful.

I've been working on this for 5 hours now!  Not bad!  If my full-time job was writing, I could call it a day about now.  ...assuming I weren't desperately racing to finish an outline.

Speaking of which, where are we now?

I'm missing 6 scenes.  I am 6 scenes away from having a completed outline!  :D

Okay, before I go into Investigation #2, I really want to clear up this James thing.

I wanted a hobby that Philip could contribute to, but that's really not necessary.  The scene might play just as well if James, who has been silently seething the last 2 times he filled in for Philip, were to begin a long, loud rant about how much he hates working and how self-centered Philip is for asking James to fill in and--

James holds up a bottle of Tito's Handmade Vodka in a velvet gift bag.

And a bottle of Mr & Mrs T Bold & Spicy Bloody Mary mix.

James, accepts them and says filling in on Saturday won't be a problem at all.

Not bad, right?

I mean, it's not the most elegant solution, nor is it the funniest punchline, but I think it works.

Moreover, it can always be rewritten.

I believe in John Vorhaus's process of doing the best you can with each platform document, and keeping moving.  This outline is a platform document, getting me to the next platform, which is the First Draft.  The First Draft will be the platform document getting me to the Second draft, and so on, until it is released to the public and then belongs to the Reader.

So I'm using the Tito's joke and moving on.

OKAY...!

So now I need the arc of Investigation #2...

I have the beginning and ending:

Scene 26 - Activity has increased with Britney present.
Scene 27 -
Scene 28 -
Scene 29 -
Scene 30 - The ghost girl touches Philips hand and Britney sees dead people.
Scene 31 - Philip meets "Da Debbul".

So I need to flesh out 26 and fill 27 - 29...

This investigation is the entire mystery in a nutshell.  It's climactic, so I can pull out all the stops.  If every scene is big, that works just fine.  Also, if the activity gives the reader a glimmer at the solution, that's fine, as well.

But I guess the fundamental function of this investigation is to convince CTPI that the activity is poltergeist activity, and then convince Philip it's not.  And I have the "convince Philip it's not" part figured out already.

I need to bring attention to the garden.  I'll need be sure to write that into some earlier scene, too, but I really need to bring the reader's (and Philip's) attention to it here.  Like maybe the end table in Ariel's room--

DUDE!!!

Carlton picked his first batch of cherry tomatoes the night Ariel got scratched!  And the day Carlton's friend got shoved in the guest bathroom was the day that...  What?  Maybe he accidentally trod in some carrots planted in the garden?  The Elemental is protecting the garden.

Carlton had Ariel with him when he was planting, and she was eating cherry tomatoes as fast as Carlton could plant his zucchini, and that night she got scratched.  Then his friend accidentally steps in the carrots, and he gets shoved.

I have a hare-brained idea that maybe Philip tries an experiment wherein he plucks a flower from the garden, quickly goes to a different part of the house, then enters the section with Ariel's room and the guest bathroom, and gets tripped by something unseen.

Maybe Philip is putting things together during this investigation, so while CTPI are testing for poltergeist activity, Philip is actually working a different angle.

How does one test for poltergeist activity?

Scene 26:

Brimes Home, 5:15 pm - TIFFANI is listening to BRITNEY explain what happened Tuesday night.  PHILIP observes them while NOEL and MAX set up the equipment.  Footsteps can be heard running down the hall.  Philip had an audio recorder rolling in Ariel's room; it should have picked the sound up.  Tiffani confers with Philip: The investigation hasn't even begun and the activity has already started.  Philip observes that that doesn't prove Britney is a poltergiest agent, and Tiffani concurs, "But it doesn't prove she's not, either."

Scene 27:

At dinner, MAX coos over the salad.  Britney beams that they're from Carlton's garden.  She says that Ariel doesn't like vegetables, but she love's Carlton's tomatos.  carlton tells the story of how he had Ariel in the garden with him while he worked, and she was tearing out cherry tomatos by the handfull...  Not s much to eat them as to play with them.  Britney excuses herself from the room.  Philip asks when this was.  Carlton recalls it was probably 3 months ago.  Around the time when she was scratched?  Come to think of it, yes, around that time, why?  Did Carlton pick these vegitables earlier today?  No, he picked them Tuesday; they've been sitting in the refrigerator since then so he thought he make a salad out of them tonight.  The friend who was shoved in the guest bathroom, had Carlton shown him the garden?  Carlton can't remember, probably, why?  Parent's bedroom door SLAMS, scaring everyone out of their seats.

Scene 28:

In the study, everyone watches again and again as NOEL replays the video of the Parents' Bedroom door slamming shut all by itself.  BRITNEY walks out of the bedroom, then 12 seconds later the door slams shut.  Britney has no idea how that happened.  CARLTON says that door never opens or closes by itself.  TIFFANI wants to ask Britney some questions.  Everyone clears the Study and Tiffani begins asking how Britney is doing, if she had been feeling stressed before this stuff started happening, if Britney can remember hearing or seeing things as a kid that grownups told her was her imagination, and so on...  PHILIP knows the drill and takes this opportunity to sneak out.  Minutes later he slips into the Kitchen, holding a flower, and listens for a few minutes as MAX conducts an EVP session.  Then Philip slips quietly out of the kitchen and walks down the hall toward Ariel's room.  He trips and face-plants on the ground, dropping the flower.  Tiffani and Britney rush up to him, they saw it on the monitor.  No one can find what Philip tripped on.  Philip also can't find the flower he had dropped.

5:23 am

I think I'm about to call it a day.

7 hours of writing isn't bad at all!  AND, most importantly, I have all but 4 SCENES outlined!!!  If I were on a professional deadline, I could start writing this novel tomorrow!!!

But I have some eggrolls in the oven and I'm about to nuke some Asian dumplings, and I think I'm ready to unwind and let the rest of the weekend drift past.  (I haven't visited my dinosaurs on Jurassic Park Builder in a couple of days; I might catch up on some of my paranormal podcasts while tending to the dinos and playing some Candy Crush.)

This has been an exciting weekend!

And hopefully these blog posts have been informative for you, vaguely-curious reader!

:)

The Red Herring

Okay, so I have written the scenes that introduce the Red Herring and bring it to a head.

IN FACT... I was able to transform my place-holder raise-the-stakes Scene 23 with a more organic scene that both raises the stakes AND grows naturally from the development of the Red Herring!

Which is wonderful!  It's ART!  :D

Now...

13 scenes to go.

When I'm looking at the outline, there are these two huge, gaping multi-scene holes.

Granted, this is MUCH preferable to 4 gaping multi-scene holes in my outline!  But still...  I guess since I feel so close, I also feel a bit further away.  You know?  Like, I'm more aware of the gap between Not Complete and Complete.

Still, analyzing my feelings about the situation won't get the outline finished.

So now I have a scene that is just Amber being nice to Philip.  Some serious flirtation.  I am now set up for a devastating scene where Philip has to ask for another Saturday off from the review show.  It'll be more devastating when Amber fires him.

But then...  The way the scene is setup, she could also be understanding about Philip's needs.

However, if she's not, she and he can argue about how the movie review show is "real" and hunting ghosts isn't.

OR...

She can be understanding, but still fire him!  That would be multi-textural!  That's good!  Maybe she explains that she believes HE believes in this stuff, but she just doesn't.  No hard feelings, but she believes in her show.

That leaves the door open for a scene afterward, allowing Philip to define himself as someone who tries to explain the unexplainable!

AND!!!  It could make the very last scene with Tiffani a sort of emotional BALM for Philip and the Reader!!!  She believes in the same stuff Philip does!  :D

So that's 2 more scenes.  Or maybe 3.

I need to work on the investigation more...

So where am I now?

Scenes 1 - 7 get Philip to Investigation #1.

Scenes 8 - 13 are Investigation #1.

Scenes 14 - 18 get us to the Red Herring: Poltergeist activity.

Scenes 19 - 21 "It's a poltergeist, you're off the case!"

Scenes 22 - ?

Scene 30 - 40 have Philip figuring out the case and wrapping it up.

So I guess I need to figure out the arc of scenes 23 through 29.

That's really just 7 scenes.  I can tell 3 stories in 7 scenes.  Actually, I could probably tell 7 stories in 7 scenes, but I don't want to do that here.

But it's not rally 7 scenes, because I need a scene to have something scary happen to the Brimes so that they call CTPI back in!  And I need the scene wherein begins their 3rd Investigation!  AND... I need the scene wherein Philip takes the time off and gets in trouble with Amber!

So that's really only 4 scenes I need!  :D

But now I need to craft it...

Okay, enough work tonight.  I'll work on this more tomorrow.  (Assuming I don't get called back into work.)

Outline 006

PHILIP BLACKWOOD MYSTERIES #1

Outline 006

Sc 01 - BRITNEY BRIMES (25) is in the kitchen and sees a LITTLE BOY out of the corner of her eye.  She doesn't hear anything, just turns to see the boy running out of the kitchen.
Britney follows the boy, but he's not in the living room.  She walks on to the storage room, and finds the Little Boy standing there, staring at her, looking unhappy.  She tells him she's seen the little girl, but never seen him.  The Little Boy doesn't answer.
Does he know the little girl?  Is he is her friend?
The Little Boy says, "I'm not a boy," his voice deepens, his eyes become dark sockets, and he morphs, "I'm the Debbul."
Britney screams and flees.

Sc 02 - PHILIP BLACKWOOD (26) arrives at MISTY's house.  He has brought XAVIER, Misty's neighbor, with him.  Philip explains to Xavier that Misty has been bothered by monthly thumps on her roof that she feared were paranormal.  Xavier laughs, and also seems embarrassed about this.  Philip takes Misty and Xavier out front to show Misty the tree at the edge of Xavier's back yard that hangs over the edge of her roof.  He explains that Xavier has a cat who, once a month when the moon is full, freaks out, climbs the tree and scampers across Misty's roof to get to the Benny family's back yard.  The Benny's have two cats that Xavier's cat, Lilith Puffysox, likes to play with.  But Philip suggests that Xavier explains WHY this happens every full moon... Xavier has a garden in his back yard, and he is Wiccan.  Every full moon he performs a ritual inviting the gnomes to bless his garden.  This activity freaks Lilith Puffysox right out, so she escapes Xavier's yard to play with the Benny's cats, and shows up the next morning on Xavier's doorstep.  MISTY has no idea Xavier was a witch; she and Xavier strike up a friendship.  Philip's phone rings: TIFFANI needs a favor.

Sc 03 - TIFFANI meets PHILIP at a food cart.  She asks how the movie-review show is going and Philip says it's fine.  Tiffani says Max and Noel miss him; he misses them, too.  Yeah?  Yeah, Philip misses all of it, the coffee, the sitting for hours in the dark, trying to act like a responsible adult around clients, meetings at (insert cool Austin restaurant), the whole thing.  Tiffani asks if he can help them out with one more case.  Philip jokingly asks is there's any chance it's on a weeknight and Tiffani says "no" but rushes into the pitch: The Brimes Family are being tormented, but the group -- Central Texas Paranormal Investigators (CTPI) -- can't solve it.  It's too powerful to be residual or intelligent ghosts, it is actually hurting the family and their daughter, but 2 religious clensings have failed to exile whatever it is, and no Catholic churches in the Central Texas area will area will sanction an official cleansing.  Philip wants to help, but James (the other overnight guy) hates working on his days off and Saturday is when they tape the show.  But Philip can see that Tiffani is really, really hoping for Philip's help, so he offers to look at the evidence CTPI has collected.

Sc 04 - PHILIP review's evidence:
1. A little girl, DODDY, actually converses with the team for a couple of minutes.
2. An inhuman growl is heard in EVP.
3. A night table in the baby's room is moved 17 inches on video.
4. A small shadow turns into a large, menacing shadow on IR video.
Philip is intrigued enough to help.

Sc 05 - TIFFANI takes PHILIP to meet CARLTON BRIMES.  Britney and Areil are at Britney's mothers.  If possible, Carlton would rather wrap this up before Ariel comes home.  (This is unrealistic, but Philip holds his tongue, though Tiffani is uncomfortable with this unrealistic expectation, too, he can tell.)
Ariel's Room: Ariel scratched, furniture moving.
Kitchen: Little girl seen.
Storage room: Little boy turns into "the devil".  Growl EVP.
Parents' bedroom: Aural conversation with Doddy.
Parents' bathroom: Banging on inside, not heard outside.
Guest bathroom (near Ariel's room): Guest pushed into shower.
Hallway: Shadow IR video.

Sc 06 - Thursday Night - As soon JAMES gets in PHILIP begs him to cover Saturday.  James obviously wants to say "no", argues in his head for a few minutes, then says he'll do it.  RELIEF!  Philip tracks down AMBER.  They banter (maybe even flirt?) for a bit, then Philip dives in: He gives her a jump drive with his scripts and video and begs her to forgive him for not being able to make it Saturday.  Amber becomes an ice queen.  Philip tries to explain that he wouldn't do this if he had a choice, and Amber informs him he doesn't.  She's barely holding this show together, scrounging every bit of advertising she can con out of someone because the General Manager keeps hinting the show doesn't make enough money to keep it on the air, and now Philip is bailing, too?  He's not bailing, he just can be here Saturday.  "That's fine", Amber says, but Philip knows it's not fine.

Sc 07 - PHILIP meets TIFFANI to talk about the case.  He's going to tell her that can continue helping them on his days off, reviewing evidence or whatever he can do, but he just can't get the time off work, but Tiffani launches right in with the background: New house, no recorded deaths or psychic trauma.  Whole neighborhood was an empty field before that.  This fact interests Philip, but he won't say why just yet, he's still going to beg off the case.  Tiffani is worried this might be "inhuman", but since "civilian" cleansings didn't work, there might be nothing CTPI can do for the Brimes family.  (During their, the 2nd, cleansing, CTPI utilized an ordained minister, so they're up against the wall.)  There is another aspect that makes Tiffani want to solve the case for the Brimes family, but she doesn't want to taint Philip's opinion.  Philip starts to explain that he can't do it, but the look on Tiffani's face won't let him.

Sc 08 - 6:00 pm - PHILIP, TIFFANI, MAX and NOEL arrive to investigate Brimes house.  Philip mentions that he thinks it would be really helpful to talk to Britney Brimes, and that seems to make CARLTON really, really nervous.  (This happens over dinner.)

Sc 09 - 6:55 pm - Setup happens, PHILIP & TIFFANI investigate Ariel's Room while MAX & NOEL investigate the Storage Room.  45 minutes of nothing.  (7:45 pm) TIFFANI & PHILIP investigate Parents' Bedroom while MAX & NOEL investigate Parents' Bathroom.  Another 45 minutes of nothing.  (8:37 pm) PHILIP & MAX investigate Guest Bathroom while NOEL fast-forwards through what they have of the Hallway so far and TIFFANI checks her audio to see if she has anything.  45 more minutes of nothing.

Sc 10 - 9:24 pm - CARLTON has been surfing the Net in the Study for the last two-and-a-half hours.  He seems nervous (acting suspicious) when PHILIP tells him they haven't found anything yet.  Philip mentions this.  Carlton explains that he never believed in this stuff before, and he's still not comfortable with it now.  But since...since he can't deny it now, he's been noticing all kinds of strange things.  He thought he saw...no, he's sure he saw a black panther at the edge of his property one night, only twice as large as a doberman, maybe larger.  Britney has always been interested in this stuff, as Philip can tell from her DVDs, and a giant back cat doesn't figure into it.  Philip explains that that's not unheard of in the paranormal world, but he senses that there is more to Carlton's unease.  Carlton is hiding something.

Sc 11 - 9:30 pm - Noel volunteers to watch the cameras (set up in the Study) while PHILIP, TIFFANI and MAX investigate the Kitchen.  Tiffani leads the EVP session, trying to engage Doddy.  Tiffani's questions are about what it was like when Doddy lived here.  Afer no responses, Max asks how Doddy died.  (Philip thinks this question is a mistake, but doesn't say anything.)  Max suddenly can't breathe.  They end the session and leave the room, and Max gets her breath back.

Sc 12 - 9:51 pm - CARLTON is worried that maybe they should end the investigation for tonight.  MAX absolutely does not want to!  NOEL worries about an entity that would attack Max.  Is it, maybe, that dark thing they saw in the hall last time?  The thing that growled?  (Assuming they are the same entity.)  MAX is excited they're getting a response; it it wants to attack her again, she's not scared.  TIFFANI doesn't want CTPI to stir up anything that they can't deal with, and then leave Carlton here alone afterward.  PHILIP suspects it wasn't an attack: He points out that Max asked how Doddy died; maybe Doddy was "showing" her.

Sc 13 - 10:01 pm - PHILIP, TIFFANI, MAX, NOEL and CARLTON are all in the Kitchen trying to contact Doddy.  10:44 pm rolls around with no results.  10:49 - 11:30 pm PHILIP and MAX investigate Ariel's room.  11:40 pm - 12:25 am PHILIP and NOEL investigate the Storage Room.  12:35 - 1:20 am PHILIP and TIFFANI sit quietly in the Hallway.  At 1:48 am Philip and CTPI have packed-up and leave CARLTON, Tiffani insisting he call her cell phone if anything happens or if Carlton needs anything.  They'll review the audio and video they caught tonight and let him know.  As Max and Noel drive off, Tiffani asks what Philip thinks.  He'll let the data inform his opinion, but right now he doesn't see anything especially odd about this haunting.  Tiffani isn't pleased with this assessment -- she clearly wants Philip to come to some specific conclusion about this case, but she won't tell Philip what's bothering her.

Sc 14 - Sunday night - PHILIP works.

Monday evening - Philip begins reviewing his audio and makes notes.  He gets about halfway through it because he places audio recorders in room where he isn't.

Monday night - TIFFANI calls to see if Philip has found anything.  She and the others found nothing, so far.  Some possible EVPs and a few "orbs" in pictures (probably dust), but nothing of interest.  However, Tiffani did some research and found out that there was a low-rent apartment complex on the land for a couple of years before the land was bought by the Tiger Group out of Japan.  (1995 - 2001)  This get's Philip's attention.  He asks her if she will keep digging, and if Noel can check out UFO reports in that area while she's doing that.  Tiffani asks what Philip is thinking but he's not sure it's even worth mentioning.

Sc 15 - Tuesday night - PHILIP hears an inhuman growl uttering "GET OUT!" from the recorder in the Parent's Bathroom.  He checks the time; it's right around when Max couldn't breath in the Kitchen.  He checks the time on his audio recording of the Kitchen incident: It's an exact match!  He picks up his phone to call Tiffani, but his phone rings right at that instant: It's NOEL...  Noel has an EVP from the Storage Room that Philip needs to hear...

Sc 16 - Wednesday evening - PHILIP meets CTPI at TIFFANI's house.  NOEL feels that the identical EVPs happening at the exact moment when Max couldn't breath indicates she was attacked.  MAX is uncharacteristically scared by the EVPs.  Philip points out "Then why didn't the religious ceremonies work?"  So, Noel wants to know, what's Philip's theory.  Philip doesn't have one yet, he's still analyzing the facts.  Noel spells out the case for demonic infestation:

1. Ariel scratched
2. Little boy turns into "The Devil"
3. Parents' bathroom banging
4. Guest pushed into shower
5. Inhuman growl EVP
6. Night table in Ariel's room moves 17 inches
7. Small shadow turns into Large shadow
8. "Get out!" and Max can't breathe
9. Demons reported to pretend to be ghosts of children

But the religious cleansings would have worked if it were demonic.  Tiffani talked to Carlton earlier today and there wasn't anything going on in the house since the investigation, so they still have time to figure this out.  They just need to investigate again.  But Philip can't take another day off work...

Sc 17 - Thursday - At the TV station, PHILIP visits AMBER's office.  He wants to apologize again for Saturday.  Amber apologizes instead for her behavior: Amber is barely holding this show together, scrounging every bit of advertising she can con out of someone because the General Manager keeps hinting the show doesn't make enough money to keep it on the air, and Philip not showing up Saturday seemed like maybe he sensed the ship was sinking and was going overboard before it sank beneath them all.  A little flirtatiously, Amber asks if Philip DVR-ed the show.  He did, and he loved her changes to his segments.  Amber says she had to tweak his scripts a little because the way he writes is so... HIM.  (She makes it sound like a compliment...and maybe a come-on.)  Philip has to get back to work.

Sc 18 - At work, PHILIP checks his emails.  He got an email from Noel listing the UFO reports in the area: One witness spotted lights in the sky twice this year.  Two witnesses spotted a craft here last year. One spotted lights last year.  Another 3 spotted lights 4 years ago.

TIFFANI stops by the TV station.  Philip is surprised.  Tiffani couldn't sleep.  She explains her worry about this case: At first, her fear was that Britney might have accidentally scratched Ariel and used the paranormal activity as an excuse.  If this were what happened, should she contact Child Protective Services?  She was hoping that Philip would figure out what was causing the activity and Tiffani wouldn't need to make that decision.  But now she's worried about another possibility, one that's not as black-and-white as "a mom accidentally scratched her child".  Philip knows what she means, the option they were all avoiding, the possibility of a poltergeist scenario.  Tiffani wants them to investigate Saturday.  Philip can't... Unless...

Sc 19 - Saturday, In the Studio, 5:46 pm - The Movie Review show wraps up, and AMBER is super flattering to PHILIP about his segments.  He thanks her, but he really has to get to work.  She understands.

In Master Control, 5:58 pm - JAMES shows up, grumpy, to relieve Philip.  Philip thanks James profusely but James is pissed-off.

The Brimes Home - 6:37 pm - Philip arrives as CTPI has finished setting up.  The second investigation begins...

Sc 20 - Tuesday night - Philip meets with CTPI.  All evidence review provided nothing, nada, no evidence.  TIFFANI says they're going to have to investigate with Britney there.  NOEL and MAX don't understand.  Tiffani and PHILIP fill them in on their poltergeist hypothesis.  If Britney is poltergeist agent, why doesn't activity cease completely when she's not around?  One theory is that agent only amplifies activity that is present -- though, perhaps dormant -- before agent introduced to location.  So maybe agent stirred up activity so much that even when she's gone it's still going.  Even if that is the case, the activity should pick up when she's around.  Tiffani says they're going to need to talk Carlton into it.

Sc 21 - TIFFANI and PHILIP meet with CARLTON and explain the need to investigate with Britney present, but Carlton opposes vehemently.  They explain that this is the only way to verify that Britney isn't a poltergeist agent, and Carlton knows why they want her present, be he doesn't want this to happen.  He admits that since he wasn't a believer, once he became convinced this was all really happening he started reading up on this.  He has suspected for a while now that Britney might be a poltergeist agent, but he was hoping CTPI and Philip would prove him wrong.  He almost wishes it were demonic because if it were it could be exorcised, but now that they have proved his fears correct, he's calling off the case.  No more investigations.  If i is poltergeist and Britney is the agent, everything Carlton has read says that Britney needs to go to therapy, and he's not going to force her to do that.  Philip tries to explain that this is just a hypothesis, they have to prove it or disprove it still, but Carlton isn't having any of it.  "Please leave!"

Sc 22 - Thursday, at the TV Station - AMBER visits PHILIP.  She looked for him later Saturday night but found James working.  Philip explains that he had a paranormal investigation.  Amber didn't know that Philip did that, and they discuss what paranormal investigation involves.  Philip says this investigation is over, but it's still nagging at him.  He can't share it with Amber -- confidentiality -- but there are just some things he wishes he had the answers to.  Amber goes back home, leaving on a promising note.  (Maybe Philip gets the sense that he could have kissed her if he had just gone for it.)

Sc 23 - Friday, before work - MAX calls PHILIP.  She's bummed about the case.  This was the first time she had been scared since she started investigating six years ago and she wanted to find out what was going on.  Noel mentioned that Philip asked him about UFO reports; s'up with that?  Philip explains that sometimes ley lines converge and create a vortex, an opening point from other "dimensions" (for lack of a better word).  At these points, you tend to get ALL kinds of activity.  And when that happens, that patch of land tends to have a very, very long history or activity, going all the way back to...  Philip has an idea, can he call her back later?

Friday, TV Station, News Room - PHILIP asks reporter NATALIE HAMMOND if she can look into police reports from Brimes neighborhood between 1990 and 2000.  She asks if he's looking for anything in particular, but he's interested if she find anything at all.

Sc 24 -
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Sc 30 - PHILIP walks into the kitchen to find BRITNEY staring, silent.  He asks what's up and Britney asks doesn't he see her.  Her?  Britney points.  Philip doesn't see anything.  Britney insists that "she" is right there!  Philip walks slowly toward the spot, his hand outstretched, feeling.  Philip stops cold when he feels a tiny hand grab his own hand.  He reacts physically and AT THE SAME TIME Britney says, "Did you feel that?  She just grabbed your hand!"

Sc 31 -
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Sc 37 - PHILIP makes a deal with the ELEMENTAL: Inside belongs to the Brimes family and outside belongs to the Elemental.

Sc 38 - PHILIP explains to POE that he doesn't have to protect Doddy anymore, no one can hurt them where they are now.

Sc 39 - PHILIP explains all.  The BRIMES Family is safe here.

Sc 40 - TIFFANI and PHILIP are having lunch to discuss how the Brimes family is doing now.  Tiffani asks Philip one final question about the Brimes case...